~Insert wibbly lines as we go back to secondary school~Back then C'riz was a swot. So I got put in the group that was learning both French and Spanish at the same time, while most people just got landed with learning how to ask for a croque monsieur.
One of the group of mates I used to hang around on street corners with had the (mis)fortune of having his dad do a runner one night leaving everything behind. Everything. Including, it turned out a collection of gentleman's literature brought back from Torremolinos. He shortly had a fine business running based on his new bongo mags.
Then, one dark night I was asked if I would like to perhaps have a look, free of charge. Oh, go on then, after all, I'm sure they are full of artistic poses in the best possible taste. Underneath the dim orange glow of a street light the collection is examined. This is before the days of teh interweb, so no midgets, donkeys, golden showers or fisting, but by eck, there was everything else. If it could be inserted in an orifice, it was. For someone who had previously only seen a razzle stack it was quite the eye opener.
Er, lads, why do you need me? 'Cos there was speech balloons on all the filth. Even the ones where the lady in question clearly had her mouth very full. It was like a hardcore version of the beano. And they wanted translations...
Do I
a) tell them school Spanish is ideal if you would like to buy train tickets and do shopping?
or
b) make it up as I go along?
I just may have gone for b).
Sorry....
2 comments:
What's Spanish for "my hovercraft is full of eels"?
p.s. I was traumatised as a young bloke by a dodgy deck of playing cards - I hate to think what todays youngsters make of all that diabolical internet p0rn.
My. HOVERCRAFT.. FULLA... EELS!!! Comprende?
Sorry, I only know Brits abroad slow and shouty Spanish now. And I don't know the mime action for hovercraft either.
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